but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
I wish there were whore gnomes that cleaned our apartment when we were gone.
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
Come share oat with me in your robe
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Randomize
