weddingsv make me drug and hornr
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
Randomize
