he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
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