you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
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