I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Randomize
