i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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