I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
