He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
Actions speak louder than pants.
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
I have feelings that need drinking.
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
Randomize