So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize