Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
Randomize
