we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
Randomize