Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
Randomize
