My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
On second thought, is it weird that I scheduled a surgery that determines my fertility around lingerie football night? I might have fucked up priorities.
Absolutely not. I would have done the exact same thing.
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
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