Well douche your snatch and let's go!
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize
