Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
one two three fourrrrnication!
Old men and throwing up are my life now.
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
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