so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
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