New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
I woke up to you in just boxers at my door at 7a.m. with you saying how many squrriels you counted on the walk back, then you made me penis shaped pancakes
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
I got to her place and she was petting her cat and pounding vodka out of the bottle. She looked like Dr evil in yoga pants. She's nuttier than squirrell shit.
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
It says something about our relationship that he stole your phone to tell me about his dick at 3am and neither of us realized that wasn't you until just now
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
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