Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize
