I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
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