Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
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