I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
Did you know that cab drivers don't take quarters for payment? They don't even like it when you ask.
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
Randomize
