first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
Randomize
