My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
Randomize