Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(732): View more from New Jersey

You look like a girl that would like strip clubs

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(949): View more from California

we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds

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(419): View more from Ohio

I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.

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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball

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(405): View more from Oklahoma

I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done

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(404): View more from Georgia

He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.

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(949): View more from California

I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library

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(262): View more from Wisconsin

You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.

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(519): View more from Ontario

I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE

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