How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
I am such a fucking liability at weddings. I ended up making out with this married 40-year-old that told me that basically if I came home with him and be a sex partner for him and his wife, I would never have to pay for anything again. Extremely considered it.
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
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