i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
Randomize
