god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
Randomize
