It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
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