escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
I'd like to apologize to your liver. It sees how much beer i drink and gets jealous of how awesome my liver is.
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
Some clips from last night: grinded like I haven't since college. Took shots with a bartender with a bad ass mustache. Made up a string of lies with fake names and occupations. Slept behind the couch with pizza in my hand
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
Randomize
