what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
stop calling my apartment porn island.
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
Randomize