Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
if you are receiving this text, you are one of the people i hate
guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
Randomize
