i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
I have left a significant number of teethmarks in my prhone. My mouth tastes like tequila and cheddar. Tomorrow already feels fun.
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
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