So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
Randomize
