She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize
