I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
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