They totally botched my boob job. My tits look like they're are winking.
ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
Randomize