U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
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