I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
Just realized I've gone to court three different times with papers and a joint roller in my briefcase. #lawyeroftheyear
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
Let's get the cat blown out
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
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