Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
Randomize
