perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
I'm like five sips away from making a Craigslist post for true love and mustaches. My family is going to disown me tonight.
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
