just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
Randomize
