I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
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