i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
Oh man. I threw up in the first cab. Got kicked out. Roamed somewhere for awhile. Fell asleep in the back if the second cab. Woke up in my underwear on the living room floor with a frozen pizza (thawed) laying next to me
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
Randomize