i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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