i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
Most the numbers in my phone are mistakes. It's a virtual graveyard of people I should never pick up for.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
Randomize
