im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
Randomize