as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
tell your sister to shave her snatch
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
Randomize
