You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
I skipped work to stalk him.
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
Randomize
