hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
Randomize
