I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
in your professional opinion, what's the most elegant way of saying "sorry I spent all night flirting with you, I thought you were gay" ?
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
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