Hey man sorry I got all grabby
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
I wish life had little blips of pornography
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
Randomize
