my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
You drunkenly told one of the campus security guards that you liked his headset. In return he introduced himself, lit your cig, and told us that if anyone was giving us shit to call and ask for him... Best campus security ever.
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
